sighh. i'm so confused, troubled.
 
AHHHHHH. ):
 
how ironic life is.
we help people,  want them to change for the better.
but ourselves? we make excuses, tell ourselves its not that easy.
 
i think when matters have feelings involved,
it gets more complicated and complex.
and more difficult to handle.
 
sighh.
 
 
 

so much things these few days,
trainings, homework and sleep fills my whole mind.
it's a good thing,
no time to just ponder or reflect on issues. (:
running away...just dont want to think abt certain things.
 
run run run.
i love to run,
it makes me smile,
i think i will run, another mile. (:
 
i think pris wants to slap me.
cus i told her i wanted to "let things be".
hah.
fine la, shall solve it soon.
hopefully.
 
but really,
i guess things cannot go back to previous happy times.
hahhh.
stupid la, i think its all my fault.
 
if i didnt ....
if she didnt..
if we didnt..
and if i didnt..
if things did not happen..
things wld nt be the way it is also.
 
hah.
so troublesome, annoying.
yucks.
 
cant ppl just be happy always.
it's..impossible also. yeah.
 
actually,
what is the really meaning of happiness.
how does one define being happy?
eh, please leave comments k. (:
 
dont think that person will read this la,
but shall just say.
erm, i dont know how to treat you also. like whatever you told me, how do you expect me to react right? you know its weird, funny, impossible. so yeah, nothing much also. hope you'd get the idea soon.
 
to another person:
eh, i dont know what's gg on la. as in, i can treat you as a friend, no need for all the things you're doing now. yup. dont think too much. 
  
anw,
there are many questions flooding my mind now.
questions which would never ever ever be answered.
questions which has answers, but i pretend not to know.
dont understand? nvm. (:
 
shi//* you're mad la. have fun with your inedible drumsticks. (:
pris//* i know you want to slap me le. but you must understand, its not that easy la. thanks for you and everyone else's help. will try soon k? (:
mel//* eh, i still think its q freaky. haha. maybe you shld say hi to me oneday. dunno who you are also? yah. same name okay lar, but..name and birthdate?! hahh.
cecil//* er, the letter?
rojak//* boo. ): cant go for the nike real run with all of you le. sigh. you all have fun k? i know you all will (:
jiahui//* you're not lei anymore! haha. happy? anw, cheer up too k? i'm proud of you. (: anything, i'd be here too. thanks for your constant encouragement. (: -hugs.
 
 
 
sometimes, one can get so mad.
happy, crazy, retarded.
somehow like delirious with joy
but deep inside,
you know the smile you portray is not equivelent to how you're really feeling.